Bragging rights.

Curses! We are activating the Arc project. Forget the Separatist council! Unless Jen'ari can mount a rescue mission...

And so he shall....

-Incoming Transmission-

*The haggard, war-weary face of Lieutenant General Jerjerrod appears on the screen as furry Ewoks hang over him like a giant carpet.*

"My..apologies..sir.. These Ewok's are intense and drive a man to drinking." *He takes a swig from the flask* "Hard to handle though they are, winning seems to be in their blood. We met with a force commanded by the king of retreating Alto Stratus himself. I was still unable to bring him in, but they defeated his Nimbus brigade. They seemed to be quite fond of unconventional warfare and set up the catapult I have heard so much about. It almost crushed me when it fell the first time they were setting it up. And for some reason it was hidden and couldn't be shot. Tell me how that works? Anyways *Another swig* they charged in and somehow managed to find their way around a series of mine traps to kill the Nimbus." Teebo was defeated unfortunately but all it did was rile them up more and they killed everything on the field except that darn Stratus. These Ewoks had been erm "drafted" into Black Sun for today's fight and had the same unique ability to stay hidden that the Jawa's did last time out. *another swig* Please tell me this war is almost over. These furry fellows are too much to handle. Perhaps General Maim would like a turn with them if we have to fight again, he seems competent. Needless to say we did win. *another swig, and the General begins to stumble back to his ship* One other thing, I was unable to bring Commander Signer in for war crimes as he killed himself rather grisely. Here is the footage of him falling on his sword. "This is General Jerjerrod reporting from Tatooine, keep fighting and I'm going to sleep, Dug Vigo, you have the field"

Final Score of 215-152

Uniques Defeated: Teebo

Supreme Commander Grievous,

The hated CorellianComedian and I do battle today. Although we have temporarily "lost" the war, I will not fail you in this last mission. We will leave this galaxy with the mark of The Confederacy until we return at full strength!

Due to the vitality of success on this mission, I will personally lead my troops into battle this day! I am transmitting you a list of my Cybernetic Upgrades to remove any doubts you may have of my abilities to win this battle.

---

Lafcadio: Enraged Commander of the Confederacy
Hit Points:140
Defence: 20
Attack: 13
Damage: 20

Special Abilities (Cybernetic Upgrades):

Unique
Quadruple Attack (On his turn, this character can make 3 extra attacks instead of moving)
Twin Attack (Whenever this character attacks, he makes 1 extra attack against the same target)
Greater Mobile Attack (Can move both before and after attacking. This character can make extra attacks even if he moves this turn, but he must make them all before resuming movement.)
Vicious Attack (Triple damage instead of double on a critical hit)
Vaapad-Style Fighting (Scores a critical hit on an attack roll of natural 18, 19, or 20)
Penetration 20 (Enemies' Damage Reduction is reduced by 20 against this character's attacks)
Regeneration 100 (If this character doesn't move on his turn, remove 100 damage from him at the end of that turn)
Self-Destruct 80 (When this character is defeated, each adjacent character takes 80 damage)
Evade (When hit by an attack from a nonadjacent enemy, this character takes no damage with a save of 11)
Parry (When hit by a melee attack, this character takes no damage with a save of 11)
Flamethrower 90 (Replaces attacks: range 6; 90 damage to target and to each character adjacent to that target)
Force Immunity (Enemies cannot affect this character with Force powers, or spend Force points to reroll attacks against this character or to respond to this character's attacks and abilities)
Speed 12 (Can move up to 12 squares and attack, or 24 squares without attacking)
Corellian Hatred (All enemies with "Corellian" in their name must reroll all attacks, saves, or rolls for initiative until they roll a natural 1. This character also gets +4 Attack and +10 Damage against any character with "Corellian" in his name or against any character (enemy or ally) whom he suspects may have been born on Corellia.)
Corellian Razor ((Replaces Attack) 40 Damage to all adjacent characters)
Comedian Hatred (+6 Attack and +40 Damage against any character with "Corellian," "Comedian," or "CorellianComedian" in their name, or against any characters in a squad run by anyone with "CorellianComedian" in HIS name!)
No Sense of Humor (Enemy commanders lose all of their Commander Effects if they are in a squad run by anyone with the name "CorellianComedian")
Techno Union Hatred (This character will not (not just cannot- WILL NOT) be in the same squad as anyone with "Techno Union" in it's name. Especially not with any characters with "Techno Union Combat Engineer" in it's name! If any character with the name "Techno Union Combat Engineer" DOES manage to get into the same squad as this character, remove it immediately, and remove any commanders from your opponent's squad and replace all of them with Techno Union Combat Engineers- regardless of faction)

Force Powers
Force 10
Force Renewal 10(The number of rounds played) (This character gets 10 times the-number-of-rounds-played Force points each time he activates)
Master of the Force: Meh... however many you want (May spend Force points up to... well... up to you...in a single turn)
Eternal Hatred (Force 2: Whenever this character would be defeated, make a save of 6; on a success, this character is restored to full Hit Points instead of being defeated)
Overwhelming Force (Force 1: This character's attacks cannot be prevented or redirected this turn)
Force Lightning 7 (Unleash the Lightning) (Force 7, replaces turn: range 6; 70 damage to target and all characters adjacent to that target. Huge or smaller characters are considered activated this round.)
Force Repulse 5 (Force 5, replaces turn: 50 damage to all characters within 5 squares; push back Huge or smaller characters to 6 squares from this character. Huge or smaller characters are considered activated this round; save 16.)
Force Search and Destroy ((Force 1) All enemy Ewoks and Jawas within 6 squares of this character lose Stealth... And all their Hit Points. So There!)

Commander Effect
All allies ignore the effects of allied Techno Union Combat Engineers. Allied followers within 6 squares of this character gain Flamethrower 20 (Unless they have "Corellian" in their name - cuz they'd probably do something stupid with it.)

Cost 1

---

I hope I now have your confidence as I lead my troops to victory, Supreme Commander.

And to those Rebel Spies whom I let intercept this message, I say: The Confederacy will return! And we will release this galaxy from the shackles of freedom!

[End Transmission]

So, uh... Long story short... I won't be joining you on the ark... and Fett's dead... sorry about that.

*Intercepted Transmission from General Grievous to Lord Sideous*

Lord Sideous,

I have completed the preparations on Muunilest and have compiled this brief holo-recording to inform you of what transpired on our former capital. As I suspected, my long-time rival Obi-Wan Kenobi had learned of our plans to convert the Death Star into our Ark project for the retreat into the unknown regions. I suspect that this "Agent Scythe" could have been the one responsible for our intelligence brief but no matter. This war is lost and all that is left is survival.
Which brings me to Muunilest. Having abandoned the tactical command center due to the losses at Mustafar and Coruscant, I was personally overseeing the last of the evacuations of personnel, resources, droids, supplies and material to be sent to the Ark.
All was proceeding as planned when suddenly the spuds of blasterfire broke out in the central square outside of my command and operations center. This was followed by a powerful explosion which vaporized the command building. No doubt the Rebels had thought I was inside at the time, and I would have been if not for having to personally choke the life out of gungan trader who was giving Nute Gunray a hard time on a price for power converters and as such I was at the opposite end of the square. I quickly grabbed the closest forces to me which ended up being Gunray, a destroyer droid series 2, dwarf spider droid and chameleon droid as well as an officer that was commanding them and two others that had just arrived at the landing platform. The cyborg Lobot and our top secret researcher Dr. Nuvo Vindi, who has been heading up our biological weapons division in preparation for the other parting gift we would leave this Rebellion, the return of the Blue Shadow Virus that would wipe out almost all life wherever it goes.

I moved to secure against the assassins and it was almost a surprise when I saw that my old enemy Obi-Wan Kenobi (who had been going under the alias of Ben Kenobi... Really? No one thought that was obvious??) had led an explosives team of mine laying SpecForce units and their leader Sabine Wren. The same wench that wounded me in the past with her ghost crew. I knew that I was out-matched and so I immediately summoned reinforcements, the city's Droideka Quick Reaction Force. And then I personally led the counter attack on the assassins.

The battle was vicious but quick, my destroyer droid series 2 charged in and based the Sabine with the chameleon as over watch as the dwarf and the rebels exchanged laser and grenade fire. The enemy's thermal detonators found their mark most of the time and crippled the dwarf as well as eventually eliminated the Destroyer after it had taken two of the rebels as kills. But all of this was a distraction as Dr. Vindi set off his blue shadow virus in the center of the square affecting all enemies present. Kenobi rushed my chameleon and this is when I entered the battle. I charged in, preparing to duel the old foolish Jedi for the last time with the help of my dwarf and chameleon and the next round reinforcements came in the form of a droideka. And I knew I had the enemy surrounded and his time was at an end.... Then at this moment it became sort of blurry... I'm assuming that Kenobi has mastered the art of of his Jedi mind trick while in exile after the Clone Wars because for the next three rounds instead of unleashing my quadruple attack on him I istead felt a strong compelling urge to, respectively:
-realize he wasn't the Jedi I wanted to fight
-consider the political ramifications of common death stick use in Coruscant youth
-And turn over my Lightsabers to the enemy so he could "show me a cool trick"

All this while well I stood there activated I watched the Jedi slaughter my chameleon and deal round after round of damage on me. Some low rolls helped, as I imagine it's hard to attack someone you are tricking into having a friendly conversation. But too my advantage for the next two rounds in a row I received reserves each round. And soon there were three droidekas assaulting the general. But finally I watched Kenobi as he was mortally wounded and forced to retreat from the forces of my droids. I would have raised my arms in triumph but at that moment I finally recovered from the mind trickery of my enemy and realized that all of this I had observed from my new position laying limbless on the battlefield at the hands of Kenobi.

So the long of it is a final Confederate victory, but I am now using the last of my spare parts to rebuild into a final body. But the Arl project can move ahead. I await word of further battles to see who will be accompanying us.

I have not heard word of any attacks on the Ark itself though with time to launch drawing close I suspect that either way the launch window will be made and we will be able to extricate ourselves into the unknown regions.

Grievous Out

*end transmission*

Confederate total victory as we both went all out. He had planned for lancers and thankfully I anticipated this and brought a classic tri droid team. He would have won as it would have been only Kenobi against my support commanders and a 10 health dwarf but I ended up getting three rounds of reserves (1,5,1) and the 60 points of jedi hunting droidekas managed to drop kenobi.

Uniques lost:
Grievous SOTJ
Sabine Wren
Old Ben Kenobi

Final day to get those last battles in, come on!

Still have until Thursday.

Jak/Juice
Maim/Razz
Deaths/Jen
Amadeus/Verjal.

Here is my response battle report. (Again, CC's report in plain font, and my comments are in parentheses and bolded... Except for at the end.)

But first: THANK YOU VERY MUCH, General Grievous, for putting on and heading up this campaign! This has been a lot of fun! We should do another one of these again soon!

In seeming silence, (Once you tune out the cantina band music blaring over the loudspeakers) a tall figure (Tall, *relative to an ewok...) slowly walks across the room. His uniform tattered and scorched, (Rather like that of Commander Comedian as he exited the smoldering remains of The Corellian Legacy Legacy.) his shoulder pad cracked and splintered. (The label on the bottom reads: “Made on Corellia”) He carefully navigates the formerly-smooth (Before the rebels got to them) floors of the station, picking his way through the craters and gashes. (...This here is just a taste of what things are going to be like now that the rebellion has control of the galaxy: Craters... gashes... scorched uniforms...) He passes two soldiers, as they lead the notorious Boba Fett away in binders. (Within one minute of this man walking by, Boba Fett has already ripped his binders off like paper, dispatched the two soldiers, and made his escape. I think that’s a new record!) Lando Calrissian is nearby, cradling the fatally-wounded form of his loyal copilot Nien Nunb. (Should I just go ahead, be really insensitive, and tell him that that copilot was already dead?)

Medics are already tending to the wounded, (Band-aids and expired cans of lutefisk for everyone, again...) wiping the smoke from their eyes as they work. (That, and the stench from the lutefisk.) The tall figure stoops down, and reaches to the ground. (Applying what he learned from that aerobics class. “Down! And up!”) He picks up the dented, cracked visor of a Zann Consortium trooper, his face dimly reflected in the dusty glass. (He couldn’t stand that sight for long, so...) He lets it fall; it strikes the ground and shatters. (Again: “Made on Corellia.” Sigh...)

But the scene is not as silent as it seem. (Yeah, I know... those speakers were pretty loud...) Through a blasted-open door, (Curtesy of the rebellion.) a sea of people can be seen. Their cheers roll through the breezy Coruscant air. (They cheer as Boba Fett pops off those (three ring) “binders,” clobbers his, used to be, captors, and jet-packs away into the sky. “Long live the Confederacy,” they chant!)

As he observes the celebration from a distance, a man in grey runs up to him (To tell him the news about Boba Fett): Agent Scythe, who for so long risked his life to see this day. (“Risked his life.” Yeah, from the office downtown. Those papercuts can be brutal, man! Between that and having to watch the footage of CorellianComedian’s battles and take notes for writing up his battle reports from his cushy office chair, I’m surprised he lived to see this day.) Another man comes up behind (To get some of those Band-Aids and expired lutefisk for the two soldiers who were guarding Boba): Lieutenant Glasdren, (We call him “Glass-Half-Empty” here at Confederate HQ) his faithful second-in-command, runs up with a hologram: Agent Red leads the final charge on Mandalore. He hides in the shadows no more. (Agent Red (Rover) was like: “Hey, there’s no chance of me getting hurt anymore! I should quick get out of these shadows and pretend like I’ve been doing something heroic!” He’ll be hiding in the shadows again once he hears about Fett, who’s coming straight over to Mandalore... his home planet...)

All around the galaxy, people cheer in the streets. (Yeah, Boba’s stunt was really something to see! I’m just playing the security footage of it on loop here.) Their oppression is over. (Wait, what? Did the Rebellion collapse in on itself once it realized that it had no clue how to govern a galaxy ALREADY?! That might be a new record too!)

The Rebellion has won. (oh, nope. That must have been a typo earlier.)

* * *

Major General Comedian, of Corellia, reporting to Rebel High Command. (Major General? What, did you get demoted? Just for that one little comment about Supreme Commander Spryguy’s hair?)

It’s over. The war is over. (Commander Grievous, the rebels have officially surrendered this war.)

My final fight of this war is done. (Just couldn’t take it anymore, I guess.) We received word from Agent Scythe that Commander Lafcadio was planning to detonate a massive bomb in central Coruscant as a parting gift from Grievous. (What? Did you open your present early? Naughty, naughty... Santa Clause: Galactic Hero isn’t going to be happy with you...) With no time to assemble a strike team, the ever-ready pilots of Red and Gold Squadrons and the Red Hand rallied to my call. (CC was like: “Hey you bunch of bums! Come here! Are you guys familiar with the term ‘Suicide Squad?’ ” He made them all put on red shirts for some reason. I think he was saying something about an “Enterprise.” Oh well...) We stormed into the transit station, (You remember that “blasted-open door?” That happened at this point.) and were met with an army of the Zann Consortium’s modified Droidekas, led by none other than Boba Fett himself.

The pilots threw themselves heroically into the fray. (Like a deer... Jumping in front of an oncoming bus.) Between our speed, (Speed: Check) the element of surprise, (Element of Surprise: Eh... Not so much) technical support from R2-D2 and R7-B9, (Technical Support: R2-D2 was like: “TECHNICALLY, we have a 13.45% chance of winning this battle. Go team, go.”) and the brilliant leadership of Lando Calrissian, (Teehee teehee! Haha! Sorry, I’m sorry. This is serious. Alright! Moving on. *snicker snicker* “Brilliant leadership...”) Jon Vander, and a Klatooinian squad leader, we caught Fett off guard. (Fett was like “Whoa! Lando? He’s the brilliant leadership they were warning me about? This should be easy.)

Fett is a master of evasion, (Spent his whole childhood getting out of washing the dishes) and proved too hard to pin down at a range, but the pilots of Red Squadron were inspired to greatness, seeing what their enemy’s brutal objective was. (“Brutal objective?” He was getting on the train...) Pilot Jax C. Tarot personally fought Fett in hand-to-hand combat and emerged triumphant. (He walked right up to that Boba Fett, looked him right in the visor and said: “Hey man! You wanna fight? Cuz I know karate, Kung Fu, Jujitsu, Tyquan doe, and seven other Japanese words!”) Nien Nunb sacrificed himself in a noble effort to slow down the enemy’s advance. (He jumped out in front of one of the droidekas, and yelled: “Freeze Turkey!” His demise followed shortly. He too was wearing a red shirt.)

As Red Squadron led the charge (The stationary charge.* Still not sure how that works...) against the Zann Consortium, Lando and his staff held their own near the boxcar serving as our command base (Held their own committee meeting.* Lando was concerned about the fact that all his men were wearing red shirts, I think.) despite being set upon from several angles over the course of the battle. (Several angles... You know, Like ...one...)
In a last ditch effort, the appropriately-named “Defiler” from the Consortium left off preparing the bomb (Someone had forgotten to set the timer on the bomb before he gift-wrapped it...) and entrapped some of Gold Squadron with land mines, but the bombs were hastily prepared and failed to detonate properly (“Just Duct Tape the land mine to his face,” they said. “Press the ‘On’ button,” they said. It’s just not that simple, guys! Cut him some slack!) – which saved the lives of the pilots. (Despite the fact that they were wearing red shirts...)

In the final charge, (It was more of a mosey...) the remaining pilots, along with Lando and Vander, charged out from cover to surround and finish off the remaining Consortium droids. Unfortunately, one of the last droids focused its firepower and gunned down Tarot in his last valiant effort, (Tarot went and stood right out in the open and yelled “Shoot me!” What was the droid supposed to do?) but he was avenged with valor. (The Action With Valor!)

The only enemy to escape was their R7 unit, but I suspect its escape was aided, as we have seen no trace of it since. (Yes, he was aided: by the fact that he looked just like the rebel’s R7. Using his override when no one was watching, he locked the rebel R7 in the closet, and is currently back at the rebel’s home base wreaking havoc by opening and shutting all the doors... Teehee teehee... So, who’s the real winner here? I don’t know why the rebel R7 didn’t think to just use HIS override to just unlock the closet door and... Oh, wait... Yes I do... He was trained by the rebels... Need I say more?)
But at last, this war is over, and freedom can once again prevail in the galaxy. (So the moral of this story is: Just because a droid has “Droideka” in its name doesn’t mean it’s going to do something useful.)

One last note: the Crimson Fury pilots actually use vibroblades. (One last note for me too: Those viroblades are actually Corellian Razors. I shouldn’t have given them so much publicity... The rebels must have heard how dangerous they were, and made them standard issue...) They carry around blaster-shaped chunks of metal with limited projectile-launching capabilities, but the few times they tried, they could never hit anything that was more than two feet away. (Yep, that’s the corellian razors all right!)

Reporting in for the last time this war, (His resignation will follow shortly...)
Your humble servant,

Major General Comedian (That Demotion though... Never make fun of Spryguy’s hair, guys!)

* * *
Scary match. I ran this:

--Pilot Episode - Campaign Round 6--
28 General Lando Calrissian
21 Jon "Dutch" Vander
38 Gold Squadron Ace x2
38 Red Squadron Ace x2
18 Klatooinian Captain
12 Nien Nunb
22 Crimson Fury Pilot x2
8 R2-D2
8 R7 Astromech Droid
6 Klatooinian Black Sun Thug

(199pts. 13 activations)
http://www.bloomilk.com/Squad/166377/pilot-episode---campaign-round-6

Lafadio ran: (No kidding I ran! But HIS squad ran faster. #speed8)

--I Am Fire. I Am Death. -Boba Ski Wattentun-- (This title must have been a slip of the tongue... Judging from how the battle went, it should have been called: “I’m on fire! I am dead!”)
62 Boba Fett, Bounty Hunter (He WOULD have been useful if CC hadn’t managed to kill him before he’d gotten a single shot off!)
24 Zann Consortium Defiler (I realized too late that “Defiler” referred to his OWN squad.)
105 Zann Consortium Droideka x5 (CC just completely ignored the laws of... well everything actually against these droids... 70 hit points... Shields... Damage Reduction... And CC’s just like: “Don’t care. I’m just going to go ahead and kill all of your pieces. And take all your points no matter what physics or logic have to say about it.)
8 R7 Astromech Droid (Guys... this droid has 40 hit points. 40 HIT POINTS!!! Why is he the ONLY piece that CC DIDN’T kill?! Or even DAMAGE?!)

(199pts. 8 activations)
http://www.bloomilk.com/Squad/166327/i-am-fire--i-am-death---boba-ski-wattentun

I took the right (not that it mattered ), (Yeah, I’m sure you would have crushed me equally well from the other side...) and set everyone up in the back box of the train. Laf set up in the top and bottom corners of his side of the map, with Fett, two Droidekas, and the Defiler up top and three Droidekas and the R7 in the bottom. I moved the pilots out into the middle near the boxes (trying to avoid clumping up for splash ), and moved the commanders into the next boxcar. I actually chose Lafcadio to take the first activation, because I figured his first move would have been to open the door with override and let the Droidekas roll out from there. I was able to immediately re-lock it with some clever maneuvering. (How DIDN’T I see that coming? I seem to remember actually THINKING that he might do that...) I later let the door slip – and he parked a Droideka under the door to make sure I couldn’t lock it again – in order to protect Lando from Fett (who was only accessible because of some bad positioning on my part). Fett got close enough that the pilot’s epic range enabled me to wait until I out-activated, and then charge in and slam him with Red Squadron. From there, it was a mess of pilots running around basing Droidekas and trying to chew through their shields before getting shot to pieces. (This strategy (unfortunately for me) actually worked very well...)

I won 200-42, but must have miscounted, because I had three rounds of gambit and the only enemy still alive was an 8 point R7. (Ah HA!!! HE ADMITS THAT HE CHEATED!!! I DEMAND A REMATCH!!! Just kidding. He beat me fair and square, even without that point miscount.)

It was a good game though. When we first revealed, I was really scared to see he had 192 points of attackers with no weak point whatsoever. (But as he’s shown you, that means nothing in reallity.)

Uniques lost: Nien Nunb and Boba Fett, Bounty Hunter.

---

Major General Comedian arrives home after his awards ceremony, shiny new medals adorning his uniform. As soon as he opens the door, he knows that something’s not right. He flips the lightswitch. Nothing. The power is out. He draws his sidearm and cautiously begins to make his way through the silent house. As the general nears his office door, he sees the glow of a single flashing light emanating from within. He checks his corners and enters the room. The flashing light radiates from his holoscreen. He slowly approaches the machine. The screen is completely black except for one blinking message: “Transmission received. View now?” The general presses “Accept.” And the message begins.

[Transmission Playback initiated]

*Static* *Fuzz*

*The image is of a dimly lit room. Major General Comedian can make out a silhouette of a man sitting at a table in front of the camera. Then the figure speaks. The voice is that of Comedian’s arch-nemesis: Separatist Commander Lafcadio.*

“The war is over?” “The rebellion has won?” Not quite. When you tear down an empire, you had better be there to pick up the pieces... the loose ends. You, General, have forgotten one important loose end: Me. This war is not over. No, my war ends with you. I’m coming for you, Comedian. I may not have been allowed on Commander Grievous’s ark, but even now I have been given unlimited access to the Confederacy’s unrestricted forces. And I have only one objective: Your annihilation. There is no system where you can hide. We will not stop until we find you.

And just hope you don’t live long enough to witness the return of the Confederacy... or something worse. The Emperor has... plans for this galaxy.


[End Transmission]

Lafcadio's play reports are the best by the way hahaha. And it's been fun running it. Been trying out new step ideas (especially with all our good commanders down) and trying to surprise Spry this whole game haha. And who knows, one day the Confederacy may return........